Ugly

It’s when you look at me
all excited, innocent, absorbed
while we are walking to the park
when you outpour what’s on your mind
like a child who can’t lie
and then you look at me again
because it’s my turn to say something
that I feel ugly, I feel
my face is flat like a piece of paper
lips two thin lines
eyes wandering, checking when you are not looking
ashamed, guilty
unable to join you in real time
like a creep
a thief
sucking away your sincerity
offering nothing back